One of the biggest lies I think we’ve bought into is that you can have it all to an exceptional standard.

In other words:

– You can have an incredible high-powered career, while also

– Being the most wonderful and present parent, while also

– Being a thoughtful and selfless partner, while also

– Having a pristine home at all times, while also

– Serving up gourmet food cooked entirely from scratch each day, while also

– Being a fitness inspiration, while also

– Prioritising self-care and rest, while also

– Pursuing interesting and varied hobbies, while also

– Having a rich social life, while also

– Nurturing deep relationships with treasured friends, while also

– Helping others and making a positive impact on the world, while also….

You get the gist.

The truth is, we all get the same allocation of time – let’s call it 100%. We get to divvy up that time between our various priorities, but what we don’t get to do is allocate 100% to each.

Generally, we feel happier when our desired allocation matches our actual allocation. If you want to prioritise your family and give them 50% of your time and effort but you actually only invest 5%, you will feel dissatisfied or in conflict. If you’ve made a conscious choice to give 50% and follow through on that – you’ll feel happier and less guilty – as long as you don’t compare yourself to others.

One of my favourite sayings is “Comparison is the thief of joy”. While I love celebrating others and may admire things about them, I’m always conscious that I don’t know their allocations. I’ve personally allocated a large chunk of my 100% to my work as I find it incredibly meaningful and fulfilling. And I’m lucky that my husband puts most of his 100% into our family.

But no, I don’t feel bad for not making it to every school prizegiving.