Am I Autistic, ADHD or both?

A guide to reflecting on your patterns and experiences

Let’s get one thing straight: autism and ADHD aren’t mental illnesses. They’re neurotypes - natural variations in how human brains are wired.

If you’ve ever looked at the official DSM-5-TR diagnostic criteria and thought, “That doesn’t sound like me,” you’re not alone. The DSM was written for clinicians, not for people trying to understand themselves. Its language can feel clinical, deficit-based, and far removed from lived experience.

This guide keeps the same broad structure as the DSM but translates it into plain English, with real-world examples of how traits often show up - including the ways people cope, mask, or adapt.

As you read, notice what resonates. You don’t need to identify with every single example. What matters is whether there’s an overall pattern that’s been there since childhood, shows up in more than one area of your life, and requires ongoing effort - even if that effort is invisible to others.

Autism

It’s about differences in how your brain processes social cues, communication, and change - which can make connection, unpredictability, and sensory input take more effort.

Do most of these resonate?

• Social communication takes work. Conversations can feel draining or confusing. You may prefer practical topics over small talk, rehearse lines ahead of time, or replay what was said afterward. Masking can mean memorising scripts, copying others’ style, or leaving early to recover.
• ‍Nonverbal signals aren’t automatic. Eye contact feels intense, expressions don’t always match what you feel, or body language takes conscious effort. You might glance near someone’s eyes or mirror gestures to “blend in.”
• ‍Friendship patterns differ. You may connect most easily through shared interests or structured spaces (clubs, gaming, projects). Without that structure, friendships fade. At gatherings, you stick close to one person or keep busy with a task.
• ‍Repetitive movements or behaviours soothe. Tapping, fidgeting, rocking, quoting lines, or arranging objects can regulate stress or sensory load. You may mask by swapping for smaller, less noticeable movements.‍
• Preference for routine and predictability. Familiar seats, meals, or routes bring comfort. Sudden change can feel disorienting. You might mask distress until you’re in private, then collapse from the effort.‍
• Deep, focused interests. You lose hours joyfully immersed in a topic, hobby, or collection. You may hide or downplay passions to avoid being called “obsessive.”‍
• Unique sensory profile. Loud sounds, bright lights, or certain textures overwhelm you. At other times, you may seek deep pressure, spicy food, or movement. You plan escape routes, curate clothing, or keep comfort items nearby. Sensory experience can swing between “too much” and “not enough”.‍
• Childhood echoes. Looking back, you may remember needing recovery time after school, struggling when routines changed, or relying on sameness for comfort. Supports from adults may have masked differences, making them look like quirks.

Inattentive ADHD

It’s about differences in how your brain starts, sustains, and shifts attention. 

Do 5 or more of these resonate?

• ‍Overlooking details. You might miss part of an email, skip a question on a form, or submit work with small mistakes - even when you’ve worked hard. Masking can look like triple-checking, asking someone else to proofread, or apologising in advance “just in case”.‍
• Struggling to hold focus. Reading, meetings, or even conversations can slip away. Outwardly you look attentive - nodding, taking notes, making eye contact - but inside your mind has drifted or you’re fidgeting to stay anchored.‍
• “Not listening”. People may think you ignore them, even when you care deeply. You might need things repeated, or summarise back what you think you heard, feeling anxious you’ve missed something important.‍
• Starting is sometimes easier than finishing. Projects stall half-done, chores sit mid-way. You create accountability systems or external deadlines to push through, but still end the day with many “open tabs” in your brain.‍
• Organisation takes energy. You try colour-coding, calendars, and lists. Yet piles build up, steps get skipped, and you feel exhausted just deciding what to prioritise or where to begin.‍
• Avoiding long or effortful tasks. Paperwork piles up, emails stay unopened, chores get delayed until they're urgent. Masking can mean “sprint working,” relying on productivity apps, tackling hard tasks with a podcast in the background, or using a body double - having someone nearby so you can stay on track.
• ‍Losing things. Keys, glasses, chargers - even items you use every day. You set up “homes,” use trackers, or rituals, but still end up finding them in odd places.‍
• Distractibility. A ping, a background sound, or your own thoughts can pull you away. You might block notifications, wear noise-cancelling headphones, or face away from distractions, but your own busy mind is harder to silence.‍
• Forgetfulness. Appointments, errands, and steps in a routine or process can slip, even with alarms and reminders. Others may see unreliability; inside, you feel like you’re constantly juggling to keep everything in the air.

Hyperactive / Impulsive ADHD

It’s about restlessness in your body or mind, and thoughts that move fast.

Do 5 or more of these resonate?‍

• Fidgeting. Tapping, bouncing, doodling, or shifting positions without noticing. You may mask by squeezing a stress ball under the table or moving your toes inside your shoes.‍
• Difficulty staying seated. Meetings, meals, or movies make you restless. You find excuses to stand, stretch, or walk around. If you can’t, tension builds.‍
• Restlessness inside. Even if your body looks calm, your mind is jumping - replaying lists, anticipating what’s next, or spinning on worries. Outwardly you may seem composed; inwardly, you’re always moving.‍
• Quiet activities feel uncomfortable. Silence can feel empty or itchy. You fill it with humming, scrolling, background noise, or self-talk. You build little rituals to make “relaxing” tolerable.
• Always “on the go". Even when you intend to rest, you end up multitasking, volunteering first, or starting side projects. Slowing down feels unnatural.‍
• Talking a lot or fast. Stories run long, you interrupt or finish others’ sentences, or excitement tumbles out. Later, you may feel embarrassed and make mental notes to hold back.‍
• Blurting answers. Excitement or urgency pushes words out before the question is done. You practice pausing, but sometimes realise only after the words escape.‍
• Struggling to wait. Lines, games, or group discussions feel physically uncomfortable. You fidget, zone out, or strategise how to move things along.‍
• Interrupting or intruding. Joining conversations mid-flow, jumping into activities before you’re invited, or overstepping boundaries. Masking might look like self-checking (“Wait, is it my turn?”) or pulling back after the fact.

When You’re Both - AuDHD

Many people fit both patterns (research suggests more than half of autistic people also meet criteria for ADHD).

Living with both can mean:

• Craving structure and routine, but feeling restless and bored inside them.
• Carefully scripting conversations, but still interrupting when excitement takes over.
• Losing yourself in deep interests, but forgetting daily basics like eating or chores.
• Creating detailed routines, then abandoning them for novelty.

Masking, compensating, and recovering can feel like a second job. Outsiders may not notice, but you feel the constant effort of balancing two different pulls in your brain.

A Note on Overlap with Other Conditions

Because the DSM criteria are narrow, autism and ADHD are sometimes mislabelled. Autism can be mistaken for OCD, depression, or borderline personality disorder. ADHD can be confused with anxiety or mood disorders. That’s why it’s important to reflect on the overall pattern across your life, not any single behaviour.

Final Thoughts

If you recognise yourself in these descriptions, it doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means you’re wired differently - and that difference comes with strengths as well as challenges.

Many autistic and ADHD people describe creativity, deep focus, problem-solving, empathy, passion, and persistence as part of their neurotype. These qualities often sit alongside the difficulties - sometimes even because of them.

Self-understanding and self-compassion can go a long way. So can support, whether that’s formal accommodations, therapy, medication or simply permission to do things in the ways that work best for you.

Thriving isn’t about changing your wiring. It’s about recognising your neurotype, valuing yourself as you are, and finding sustainable ways to live in a world that wasn’t quite designed with you in mind.